:P

Sunday, December 5 @ 2:21 AM

Mum wake me up in a hurried tone. I wonder what happen. And she told me Grandma is in hospital. Went in malaysia. On the journey in, everyone thought it was nothing serious. But when we reached the hospital, went in the ward. Saw her. We cried. My dad. I first time saw him crying. It really hurt me. I went in myself. Not with my mum, dad or bro. Facing her alone. I break down when I saw her. I cant stand looking at her, not even one. She was skinny. PLAIN SKINNY. Pipes and tubes all over her. What the hell is this!? I said: 外婆，我是欣仪. I repeat myself 2 times. I can hear her trying to breath. Trying to breath real hard. I told her that Brother will come in and see her soon. But the stupid nurse just say my brother is not alone to go in! WHAT THE. Not even my little promise to her. Even this, I cant do it. This might be the last promise. Yet I cant do it again!

I am sorry. I shouldn't have said such words about you. Anger and hate was on the top of my head. Saying thing like this was useless as I'm watching you suffering and leaving. This was not my intention. I do not see this coming. Please forgive me.

SsinyiI